Family
by ValkyrieAce
Summary: Harry deals with pain and emptiness upon the aftermath of Sirius' death, but finds new family in the friends beside him. Please read and review!


_Author's Note: I would like to dedicate this to my sister, Paddy. The only reason I've come as far as I have is because of her support and her encouragement. I would also like to thank my beta, davros fan, for helping me by bringing in new insights and weaving my story into a piece of work I can be proud of. Please read and review if you have anything to say!_

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 **Family** by ValkyrieAce

 _At 12 Grimmauld Place..._

Silence reigned in the moonlight. Traditionally, this room was used for Order of the Phoenix meetings, but no one opposed the decision. It was Sirius's home after all. Suddenly, he heard the fireplace flare, people pouring out of the Floo to share their condolences.

Harry could feel them staring. He could feel others whispering questioningly around him. Wondering why their Saviour wasn't able to save someone he loved. Wondering if he should ever have been trusted to save the rest of the Wizarding World in the first place.

He could only stare as the members of the Order paid their respect, and left for their homes, where they could bask in the warmth of their loved ones. At least they still had their loved ones to hold on to.

He was thankful that not many words were being said. All he could think about was Sirius. Their second chance at a home together, gone, just like that. The last remaining link to Harry's parents other than himself. He didn't get to say good-bye.

Harry knew it was his fault. The vision was terrifying, and in a blind panic, he had ignored Hermione's words of caution. ' _If he had just stayed,_ ' Harry thought angrily, ' _and took the time to check on Sirius in the first place, he would still have been alive._ '

It hurt. It _hurt_ too much. He felt like he didn't exist, intangible, yet the pain kept him grounded somehow. The pain of losing the family he never had.

The silence faded as Remus limped into the room, leaning heavily against the wall, his eyes red and puffy. He slid over to Harry and pulled him into a comforting hug.

Harry stared at Remus, blinking unknowingly. He was stunned by the realization that someone he loved could be taken away from him in what seemed like less than a second. It wasn't as though he hadn't experienced the Killing Curse before, but he had not been old enough to truly understand the horrors that came with it.

The silence was starting to overwhelm him. He remembered seeing the emptiness cloud Sirius's eyes before the Veil closed. He could feel the cold and the darkness threatening to swallow him too. He shivered slightly.

His godfather was gone.

Sirius was gone.

Unable to bear the silence any longer, Harry left for his room. He looked at his reflection in the cracked mirror and wondered how different he would have been if he had been taken in by Sirius all those years ago. Would he be happier? Would he love in the same way? Would he still be friends with Ron and Hermione?

There were so many unknowns. So many different paths to take. Yet, for some reason, they had landed on this route. Why couldn't he have been the one to die instead? The loss was almost too much to handle. He was so afraid of the vision coming true, of his one last true family dying, that he led Sirius right into the trap.

Harry knew that the emptiness would overtake him and trap him like his reflection in the mirror. In his anger, he drove his head into the mirror, feeling the painful impact upon his scar. The cracks in the mirror grew until they fell into the sink in shards, the crash sounding like a wind chime tinkling off-key.

Grabbing a particularly large shard, he looked at the damage he'd self-inflicted onto his head. Lifting it closer to his head, he noticed that the skin under the scar was bleeding. He grabbed a washcloth and cleaned the wound haphazardly, before falling onto the bed with a long, pained groan.

"Harry? Are you in there?" asked a familiar voice. Harry sat up and looked towards the door.

"Yes, I am. Come in," muttered Harry.

Hermione walked to the edge of his bed, tentatively reaching out to touch his shoulder and offer some comfort.

"How are you feeling?" Hermione asked softly, sitting next to him. Harry winced, turning to her.

"God, that is a stupid question, Hermione. How do you think he feels?" She muttered. Harry snorted, but at the look on Hermione's face compelled him to answer her questions truthfully.

"It was my fault, Hermione," Harry spoke, his voice barely a whisper. "I should have checked if he was home first. If I did, this wouldn't have happened..."

"Oh, Harry... I know I said so, but Sirius would have come through for you no matter whether you chose to go into the Ministry or not. We had no way of knowing that the vision was planted. He would have done the same if he was in your place," Hermione reasoned.

"Do you think... Sirius knew what would happen?" wondered Harry.

"Why do you say that?" asked Hermione.

"A few minutes before he fell into the Veil, he told me..."

Harry's throat clogged up, and tears threatened to fall from his eyes. Hermione, ever the attentive one, held his hand and guided his head to her shoulder.

"He told me... that he would 'always be with me in the end', and that he loved me like a son," Harry croaked, his voice cracking. He curled into a ball and, with shaking shoulders, sobbed into Hermione's shoulder.

Hermione's heart broke as her dearest friend's composure crumpled into raw, broken sobs. She knew she would never understand, as she hadn't been through the same things as he has. But she would do whatever she could to make him feel better. He was there for her when she needed him.

It was 30 minutes later that she noticed Ron lurking at the door. She signaled for him to come sit by Harry too. Ron shuffled into the room quietly, and flung an arm around their shoulders, bringing them into a group hug.

"Hey, Harry... I, uh, have something for you," Ron started. "Sirius actually gave me something to pass onto you just in case..." Ron trailed off, knowing they understood his implication.

Harry reluctantly lifted his head and took the items Ron held out for him. The first item was a bar of chocolate, courtesy of Remus. He croaked out a watery laugh and split the bar evenly for all three of them.

The second, however, was puzzling. It looked to be an envelope with the seal of the Noble House of Black. _'Sirius,'_ he thought. He accepted the letter opener Hermione passed, and tore through the end delicately.

"Where did you get this?" asked Harry. Ron smiled nostalgically.

"He asked me to, ages ago," said Ron.

 _To my dear godson Harry,_

 _If you're getting this letter from Ron and Hermione, then it means I've passed on. If so, then there are a few things I have to say._

 _Your father was my brother in all but blood. When you were born, I knew I would spoil you as my nephew. But I didn't know all that I do now, and I can't change the past any more than anyone else can._

 _I know that as the Boy-Who-Lived, many people will look to you for guidance and support. But you are just a child. You were thrust into this life, you didn't choose it. And I will do everything I can while I am alive to try and give you the childhood you deserve._

 _Instead, I will fight for you. I will die for you. I will sacrifice everything I have for you. What else can I give but my entire being?_

 _With that said, know this: Even in death, I will always be there with you, in your heart._

 _Love,_

 _Sirius_

Harry's eyes burned with tears. He folded the letter back up as though it were precious and placed it on his table. He hugged Ron and Hermione tightly, and closed his eyes. Hermione and Ron stared at him worriedly, but when his eyes opened again, they noticed the spark in his eyes. They exchanged glances and shared a small smile. They knew Harry would pull through.

"We will always be here for you, Harry," said Hermione.

"Yeah, we will. We've been through so much together, you're practically family in every way that matters," Ron continued.

"Promise?" Harry breathed, quietly. They shared a grin, nodded and promised:

"Always."

 **Fin**


End file.
